Sure things...

Taxes. It's that time of year again.

For some of us, those that insanely think they can go it alone with their own business, taxes are an all year long chore.

Each month there's federal payroll tax and state payroll tax. Quarterly there's federal unemployment tax as well as state unemployment tax. Like every one else I pay personal property tax. That's a good one. The more pleasure we seek from life, 650 cc 4 wheeler, bass boat, bigger house, etc (or in my case a 250, canoe and small apartment) the more we pay. And I own the property the field is on so I pay real estate property tax, which includes a timber tax and something added on the bottom called "specials". Make improvements and that tax goes up.

And another good one - business personal property tax. I'm taxed on the stuff I own that helps me make money so I can pay my taxes.

Each month I pay sales tax, 6 percent to the state and another 1 percent to the county. I'm about a half mile outside the town border so I miss out on that sales tax. I imagine if they ever find out I make a dollar of profit here they will start talking annexation.

(edit: some will point out that my customers pay the sales taxes and I just pass them on to the appropriate coffers. But hey, a couple thousand dollars a month is a couple thousand dollars!)

(edit: Also, sales taxes go to fund our schools, roads and prisons. I'm sure you'll agree we are getting our monies worth there. It also goes to libraries, firemen, police and Arkansas' Children Hospital - all of which I would gladly pay double.

At the local Wally-world, depending on the purchase and phase of the moon there is a 9 percent sales tax, a 6 percent sales tax and a 2 percent sales tax. I love walking out of there with a winning trifecta receipt. I use my "sales tax exempt card" when I purchase food and drink for the concession. I feel like Robin Hood using the card to steal from the rich and give to the poor, until I get back to the proshop where I have to collect from my customers the sales tax I didn't have to pay Wallyworld.

There's a hazardous material tax added to my CO2 delivery. There's also a fuel surcharge. That's their way of charging me for the tax they have to pay for their gas. Oh, and of course that reminds me. Gasoline tax.

Electricity is taxed as well as water and trash. And then there is the phone. Arkansas sales tax, state deaf tax surcharge, state telecommunications relay service surcharge, state universal service fund surcharge, federal excise tax, county 911 tax, national access fee, county sales tax and, of course, the universal service fund surcharge.

There's more but I don't want to give anyone the idea I'm whining. It's all so complicated I have to pay a bookkeeper to keep it straight. Yes, that fee is taxed, too.

There may even be a couple I don't know about. I hope neither the IRS or county assessors read this.