I wonder how the technical mumbo jumbo reads??

Everything that's wrong with tournament ball in 5000 words or less from a post over at 68Caliber:

"So what are the benefits of upgrading your marker to the latest version of software? Rather than baffle you all with technical mumbo jumbo here (is) a quick summary of the main improvements in this revision of software:

Millennium 9 and PSP 9 Preset options allowing you to conform instantly with 2009 rules by selecting the relevant option from the Preset (blah blah blah)

The MAX ROF (Maximum Rate of Fire parameter) lower limit has been reduced to 7.5 balls per second to allow users to account for any variance in the equipment that is being used to measure Rates of Fire such as PACT (blah blah blah)

The SAFE ROF (default Rate of Fire if an eye fault is detected) has been reduced to 8.0 balls per second, meaning that if your Break Beam Sensor System defaults for any reason whilst playing your Rate of Fire will not exceed 8.0bps (blah blah blah)

The FSD DLY (First Shot Drop-off Delay parameter) can now be edited and set to the users (blah blah blah)

No more incompatibility issues with newer revisions of the Empire Magna RF transmitter. Enhanced Training Mode whereby the firing cycle is inhibited and replaced by a tone emitted through the (blah blah blah)

If you do not have the latest version of software, then you can get it COMPLETELY FREE OF CHARGE by taking your marker to the Eclipse Tech Support Booth at any of the following events over the next couple (blah blah blah)

Presets? ROF? MAX ROF? FSD DLY? Break beam sensor system? Enhanced training mode? Someone call NASA! I think I'm having a MMC-ME here (Mind melting cro-magnum episode).

(My "blahs"! Sorry, Steve. How could I pass on such irony?)